Squash or Zucchini Anyone?

It’s now late in the game and the score is Bugs – 2, Me –Zip. Both my crooked neck squash and zucchini plants succumbed to a terrifying backyard press by legions of squash bugs and striped cucumber beetles.  (Adding insult to injury, the beetles were carrying bacterial wilt).

Yet, not all is lost!  Unknown to my foes, I’ve got two more plants hidden away in the front of my place. So far, they have escaped the notice of both bugs and beetles. I just have to wonder for how long that will continue?

In a year that has already seen torrential rains, hordes of cicadas, Japanese beetles and, most recently, hundred degree plus days, is it too much for me to ask for a couple of healthy fruit?

Let’s see. I know it’s a squash. Isn’t it?

This season, due to a mix of sloppy record keeping, inattention and a touch of senility I seem to have quite a few ‘mystery plants’ here and there in my backyard beds. This lack of detail is a recent development for me. I used to be oh so picture perfect when it came to what went where. I even used to put those cute little plastic markers next to each perfectly aligned row. Using a magic marker, I would painstakingly write out the name of the vegetable and its variety. That way, when harvest time rolled around, I knew exactly what was what.

These days my methods are, shall we say, a little more loosey goosey. This spring, seed packet in hand, I would often sow the seed and then look around for a small twig or stick to mark the row thinking I would remember what went where. I called it my ‘stick it and forget it’ method of planting. Problem is, now I have no idea of what the heck is what. Take my squash plants for instance. I have this nice little guy now growing rather quickly and can only guess that it’s a crook-necked squash.

So, that’s the deal for 2011. I don’t mind all that much. I’m always thankful for anything that comes from nature and God.

Squash: My new discovery for 2011!

It wasn’t until a friend (a person from whom I get lots of free stuff) mentioned that she just ‘loves’ squash, that I decided to investigate the subject. (Brandy, you owe me)!

Firstly, I freely admit that I’ve never eaten even a morsel of any of the many varieties out there. As a member of the cucurbit family, botanically speaking a squash is actually a fruit (perhaps that’s the reason I've shied away?). In America, we often divide it into summer and winter varieties. So-called summer squash is harvested while it's still immature. These varieties can be served raw in salads because the rind has yet to toughen. This group includes zucchini, patty pan and crookneck. Their tender state requires they be eaten soon after harvest.

Winter squash varieties, like the Butternuts and Hubbard’s, are simply squash that are allowed to fully mature to the point where the rind becomes tough. (This allows the fruit to be stored until winter before being consumed; hence they are called winter squash). Duh! These guys must always be cooked first and the flesh scooped out.

I’m thinking, for my first go around, that I will want to try out the immature (summer) stuff first. Squash, from a nutritional standpoint, is often given an 'A' grade. So, I guess it does have something going for it. It’s prepared in numerous ways (you could say tortured) by mashing it, slicing it, frying it and baking it. It’s served raw on salads, in soups casseroles and yes, some weirdo’s even stuff the crap out of it! Sucks to be squash I guess. For my part, I think I’ll try Southern Fried Squash for my first go. I am a gentleman, after all. Now all I have to do is find someone who plans to grow it this season. Ah, that’s where my friend with the free stuff comes in. My plan will be to offer to buy her some squash seeds as a way of settling old scores (both her and her mom have plied me with lots of fresh eggs over the winter).

I hope to see you all later this growing season, when I plan to author a truthful and complete blog on the joys of eating this veggie that has a name which sounds like something you'd do to a bug! (Actually, in other parts of the world, notably in Central America where it originates, it’s called ‘Marrows’). I think I start calling it that. So, see you all to-marrows.